Written by contributor Arianna Carlson of For the Love of Motherhood
“Because there is no one way to be a perfect parent, but there are a million ways to be a great one.” Kelle Hampton
Whether you are a stay-at-home or working mom, being a mother can be one of the most difficult things that you have ever done. There will be days that make you wonder if you measure up, if you’re doing you’re best, if you were even meant to be a mother. You will doubt yourself, judge yourself and feel inadequate. You’ll compare yourself, blame yourself and maybe even wish you weren’t a mom.
It’s during these times, I reach out to other fellow moms because I know that there is someone else out there who is feeling exactly the way that I do, perhaps even at the exact time.
Moth•er•hood is defined as the state of being a mother. To me, motherhood is a test of endurance. Most days, I know I’m a good mom. Some days, I don’t even care whether or not I am, because I can just look at my son and know that I’m doing it right.
Motherhood is like a sorority, a group of women who fully, and wholehearted understand exactly what you are going through. There are no words needed, explanations to be given, or excuses to be made. We’ve been there, done that. We know exactly how you feel. It sounds so cliché, doesn’t it?
For me, my biggest challenge is not about being a mother. I love being a mom. Sure, not every single moment, but on the most part, I enjoy, even long for moments I can spend with my son. I find parenting fulfilling and valuable. I derive pleasure from playing with hot wheels, finger painting, and molding play-dough.
My struggle is more about finding the time to connect with myself outside of my role as “mom.” As moms, we give so much of ourselves to our children, and expect so little in return. Lately, however, I’m realizing that it’s time for me to be more than a mom, to remember that the more of myself I keep, the happier I will be for my family. If we don’t look after ourselves physically, mentally, and emotionally, then there is very little left to give.
So, what do I enjoy doing outside of my work and taking care of my son?
As if that’s not enough to figure out, what also gets pushed by the wayside is time with my husband, or the time and space to be a wife. In today’s fast-paced world, husband and wives gets squeezed between morning rituals, sports, activities, meals, laundry, bath time, bedtime, and everything in between. Our high-tech immediate world all so often means that texting and emails supplant conversations, either via the phone or face-to-face. It’s a challenge finding the energy at the end of the day to just connect, even if only for a few minutes.
For today, though, I will not dwell on not being good enough, nor worry that I’m not measuring up. Instead, I will celebrate Motherhood and take care of me. Happy Mother’s Day! How did you celebrate Mother’s Day this year?
– Photo was taken by the very talented, Katie Witt of www.KatiePhotog.com